“Unlock the Secrets of Fierce Editing: Transform Your Manuscripts from Mundane to Mind-Blowing!”
It’s your job to edit the movie so the reader can see it on the first reading without editing. Something like this:
Eric walked up and put out his hand. “Hey, buddy!”
Joe slugged him in the gut.
Example 2
Wrong: The front door swung open as Madeline strode in.
This one’s better. Things are shown in the right order. The two events take about the same amount of time. But Madeline can’t make her grand entrance until the door’s open.
Better: The front door opened, and Madeline strode in.
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