“Unlocking the Secrets of Selflessness: How ‘Happy to Help’ Challenges the True Cost of Being a People Pleaser”
In her new essay collection, Happy to Help: Adventures of a People Pleaser (Zibby Books, 2025), Wilson shares many of her people-pleasing stories. Following an introduction are eighteen thematically titled essays, each one depicting a specific time from her life when she is trying to figure out who she is and what she wants while simultaneously trying to please everyone.
In her introduction, she greets her readers with a whirlwind description of lugging her children and her accoutrements onto and from a city bus every morning. She anticipates “the presumptive annoyance of those behind [us] in line,” which causes her to embrace a superhero power of doing it all quickly and efficiently. She may feel successful inwardly, but outwardly she does not receive any assistance or admiration from those around her for being so capable…even though she admits she is hoping for some recognition. “But no one ever told me they noticed all that I was managing, and that I was really good at it.” Yet, she concludes, “And why would anyone have offered me help, when I was endeavoring so hard to show everyone that I didn’t need any?”
