“Unraveling the Threads of Destiny: What Happens When the Past Repeats It’s Darkest Secrets in Hayley Notter’s ‘Again’?”
It didn’t matter that Robert would have understood. He always understood me. But I knew if I told him about Sandra, it would make everything about what we were doing, the kind of people we were, so much worse. So I pushed my tongue into Robert’s mouth as hard as I could because I wanted him to remember we were children of fathers who fucked other women, the two of us repeating history because it was in our blood, because we didn’t know what else to do.
What was real, more tangible than Robert’s teeth nipping my skin, was the Sandra I’d created in my mind. Sandra, with her blonde hair teased to defy gravity, sultry plum lipstick, and bright red fingernails. Sandra, who probably—no, definitely—drank vodka cranberries and excelled at swirling her tiny cocktail straw in a way that highlighted her breasts. Those breasts would be winking up at a man who couldn’t help himself, because it wasn’t his fault Sandra was so manipulative and alluring, and it didn’t matter that both of them had spouses and children because when you were an adult, sometimes these things just happened.
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