How to Write Short Stories That Make an Emotional Impact

Though writing a short story is challenging, there are a lot of reasons to do it. It can serve as a proof of concept for a short or feature film, a powerful means of self-expression, or even as an effective writing sample. In fact, Michael Dinner, showrunner of Justified: City Primeval, told me in Final Draft’s recent Write On podcast interview that he often prefers to read short stories instead of a spec script when looking to hire new writers.  Whatever reason you choose for writing a short story, the trick is to make it resonate emotionally with the reader. And if you’re just getting started you might want to also check out our article on how to get started writing a short story.   

Here are a few tips for making your short story resonate with readers on a deeper level. 

Craft a Killer Opening Line

The first sentence of your short story should immediately capture the reader’s attention. It should hook the reader and compel them to keep reading. Here are a few opening lines that do just that.

“I’m pretty much fucked.”

– Andy Weir, The Martian

Immediately we want to know, why this person is “fucked” and in what very bad situation is this foul language appropriate? The sentence is short with an active voice. It’s intriguing. 

“The cage was finished.”

—Gabriel Garcia Marquez, Balthazar’s Marvelous Afternoon

This line can’t help but make us wonder what exactly is going on in that cage. Presumably, it’s an animal, but what if it’s something more sinister, like a human? We definitely want to keep reading to find out.

“They shoot the white girl first.”

—Toni Morrison, Paradise

Violence mixes with race in this powerful opening line. It’s startling and takes you right into a danger-filled moment with life-and-death stakes. 

For your short story, think about the most emotional moment or explosive place you can begin the narrative. If you can also convey tone and setting in your opening sentence, then your opening will be even stronger. 

Create Vivid, Sensorial Images with Your Words

A short story should evoke a specific time and place. You can paint a graphic picture of the setting by using descriptive language that appeals to the senses. Describe the natural elements, like the cold, salty sea air hitting your face as you board the creaky wooden sea vessel. Or the candy-colored tropical flowers that smell sickly sweet in the stifling, humid air. The more you can detail the smells, sounds and specific items in your setting, the more you can intensify emotions and immerse readers in the story.

Read more on how short stories are quickly becoming a great way to break into Hollywood with this interview Final Draft conducted with Verve lit agent David Boxerbaum.

Build Relatable Characters

People don’t read short stories to find characters that are simply likable, they read them to find characters who are struggling in ways they can relate to. In fact, your protagonist doesn’t have to be likable at all if we understand why they do the things they do. Your characters should feel like real people with strengths, but also flaws – big flaws that cause trouble for them. The more they struggle, the more they will evoke empathy from the audience.

In Annie Proulx’s short story “Brokeback Mountain,” on which the 2005 film of the same name starring Heath Ledger and Jack Gyllenhaal is based, the character Ennis tries to fit in with society and provide for his wife and daughters by ranching. But at the same time he tries to reconcile his powerful feelings for Jack, his lover. Spending the night in a hotel room together, Ennis confesses to Jack how twisted up he feels inside:

“That summer,” said Ennis. “When we split up after we got paid out I had gut cramps so bad I pulled over and tried to puke, thought I ate somethin’ bad at that place in Dubois. Took me about a year a figure out it was that I shouldn’t a let you out a my sights. Too late then by a long, long while.”

Ennis is relatable because we’ve all had that one person we loved and missed so much, we felt physically sick. But Ennis lives in a time and place where men are not supposed to love and miss each other and Ennis doesn’t know how to handle his feelings – this is his flaw, causing him to live a lie.  

Raise the Stakes

Give your characters actions that conflict with their personal histories and values. Jumping off a boat into the ocean to save a puppy is a no-brainer for most people, but if you almost drowned in a boating accident as a child, the stakes of that jump become much greater. You can add an emotional charge to a simple act when we know there is past trauma around it. 

Include Turning Points

Your protagonist should have to make at least one big decision in your story – if not several big decisions. If your protagonist has to make a choice, whether it’s to jump off a boat, or love someone they know will break their heart – the entire story will turn in a new direction. These turning points can trigger strong emotional reactions in both the characters and the readers.

Don’t Underestimate the Element of Surprise

Another way to hook the reader emotionally is to do something unexpected. A sudden kiss, a gunshot, a plane crash – all these things can excite or jolt the reader out of the normal, predictable world and into a surprising, emotional state. Unexpected twists and turns challenge readers’ expectations and add an element of excitement, wonder or humor.

In Mary Gaitskill’s short story “Secretary,” which inspired a film of the same name starring Maggie Gyllenhaal in 2002, we follow Debby, a young, fledgling secretary trying her best at her new job at a law office.

Unfortunately, she keeps making errors in the letters she types for her boss. When verbally reprimanding her doesn’t seem to improve the quality of her typing, he tries a new tactic when he calls her into his office and asks her to bend over and read the flawed letter:

Shaken and puzzled, I did what he said.

“Now read the letter to yourself. Keep reading it over and over again..”

I read: “Dear Mr. Garvy: I am very grateful to you for referring…” He began spanking me as I said “referring.” 

He’s spanking his secretary? On her bottom? In the office? This surprise really grabs your attention considering how mild-mannered and uptight Debby seems to be. Whether you find this turn in the plot disturbing or hilarious, it is certainly unexpected and almost ensures you will read to the end.   

Keep the Story Moving

A quickly-paced story can create an exciting, page-turning experience for the reader. You’ll still need moments of self-reflection and soul-searching for your characters, but those moments should be balanced with action and plot twists. Avoid long passages that repeat information or drag on so you don’t lose the reader’s interest.

Some great examples of fast-paced short stories are “A Sound of Thunder,” by Ray Bradbury, “Escape From Spiderhead” by George Saunders, and “Three-Ten to Yuma” by Elmore Leonard.  

Read More: Why Do Short Stories Make Great Movies?

Give Your Ending an Emotional Punch

The resolution of a story can leave a lasting emotional impression. Ensure that the ending satisfies the protagonist’s emotional arc and provides closure for the readers. Dare to make your ending an emotional rollercoaster, filled with risks, rewards and losses.

In O. Henry’s short story, “The Gift of the Magi,” we follow the protagonist Della as she sells her knee-length, chestnut-colored hair so she can buy an expensive watch fob for her husband, Jim, as a Christmas present. At the end of the story, we are surprised to learn that Jim has also made a sacrifice – the depth of which is revealed when Della opens her gift from Jim. 

For there lay The Combs—the combs that Della had seen in a shop window and loved for a long time. Beautiful combs, with jewels, perfect for her beautiful hair. She had known they cost too much for her to buy them. She had looked at them without the least hope of owning them. And now they were hers, but her hair was gone.

This ending shows the true meaning of love and sacrifice, but it also breaks your darn heart to know how much Della and Jim and willing to give up for each other. This ending will stay with the reader for a long time. 

Read More: 12 Best Short Stories to Read for Screenwriting Inspiration

Edit and Rewrite

After finishing your first draft, edit and revise your short story. Look for opportunities to enhance emotional depth, strengthen character arcs, and fine-tune the narrative. If the emotional level is at a 7, how can you ratchet it up to a 9? Save the biggest emotional responses for the ending where your protagonist either succeeds or fails at their main goal. Either outcome should evoke an emotional response. 

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Writing emotionally impactful short stories takes lots of practice, getting feedback from others and most importantly, rewriting. Emotions are fundamental to being alive, and tapping into them can help you create a story that resonates deeply with your audience. 

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