Wendy Cope: “The Waste Land” as 5 limericks

Wendy Cope

The Waste Land: Five Limericks

I

In April one seldom feels cheerful;

Dry stones, sun and dust make me fearful;

Clairvoyantes distress me,

Commuters depress me–

Met Stetson and gave him an earful.

II

She sat on a mighty fine chair,

Sparks flew as she tidied her hair;

She asks many questions,

I make few suggestions–

Bad as Albert and Lil–what a pair!

III

The Thames runs, bones rattle, rats creep;

Tiresias fancies a peep–

A typist is laid,

A record is played–

Wei la la. After this it gets deep.

IV

A Phoenician named Phlebas forgot

About birds and his business–the lot,

Which is no surprise,

Since he’d met his demise

And been left in the ocean to rot.

V

No water. Dry rocks and dry throats,

Then thunder, a shower of quotes

From the Sanskrit and Dante.

Da. Damyata. Shantih.

I hope you’ll make sense of the notes.

— Wendy Cope

       

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